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Fish Science Shows They're Smarter Than You Think.
Recently we have reported extensively on mouse related science involving the use of snacks to get mice to behave in ways that appear intelligent to scientists. We have confined ourselves to reporting projects involving mice and snacks only while important work has been going on involving crocodiles and the science of snacks.

Fish Science
by Ian R Thorpe
2010-02-23
CREATIVE COMMONS: Attribute, non commercial, no derivs.
KEYWORDS: science, scientists, intelligence, mouse, fish snacks, research, society, relationships human, humour, humor

At Boggart Blog we have often made fun of scientists, not always fairly I admit but if life was fair it would be intolerably boring. The aforementioned scientists unfortunately have only themselves to blame. Their penchant for running to the press with stories they just have not thought through properly provides us with comedy material so rich it cannot be ignored.

We also get the feeling a lot of this science is not much more than propaganda aimed at furthering the “one world” agenda of the “progressive left.” The intention is to produce societies comprised of people who all look alike, dress alike, behave alike, think alike, eat alike and would not have the imagination to ever question authority.

The New World Order or Big Brother as this agenda is affectionately known to the well read would like us all to be Vegans because all those cow farts are pumping the greenhouse gas methane into the atmosphere. Also we suspect they have caught on to the 19th century idea that meat in the diet makes people feisty, rebellious, independent of spirit and much more likely to question orders. Thus all week they are publishing reports describing the horrors inflicted on animals by the food production industry. Today it was the turn of fish.

We have previously reported on mouse science, projects aimed at showing mice, because they can be trained to earn snacks by pushing buttons with their noses are the equals in intelligence to humans. We have also reported on science involving cows, sheep, chickens, deer and crocodiles (which can be taught to speak we’re told) goats of mass destruction and ostriches. All these are as smart and at least as sentient as humans and should be grated equal right with humans, especially the right not to be eaten.

As not being on the menu is one of the rights we humans hold dear we wonder if anybody plans to tell the lions and crocodiles about our rights?

We must leave that fascinating question for another day and move on to fish science. In order to persuade us not to eat fish scientists working for the Politically Correct Thought Police are performing the mouse trick on our aquatic friends. One much acclaimed peer reviewed academic paper sets out to explode the myth that fish are stupid and only have a three second memory span by revealing these newly discovered scientific facts from a recent study:

Fish build complex nests.

Fish make decisions individually and form monogamous relationships, (honestly honey, it wasn’t what it looked like, I squirted my sperm over your eggs but the current got hold of it and carried it down to where that rainbow trout girl with the big fins laid hers,) hunt co – operatively and use tools (have you never seen a fish wielding an axe or turning a screwdriver?)

They recognise each other as individuals and keep track of who is to be trusted and who is not (yeah, I can believe that, I was walking by a stream near where a guy was fishing with a lure only last week when two trout popped their heads out of the water and one said to the other, “See that little metallic fucker with a line attached to his dorsal fin and a hook protruding from his belly. Don’t trust him, he’s working for the humans.)

Fish form complex social hierarchies and vie for social status. The also (and remember we are quoting from the peer reviewed scientific journal Fish and Fisheries here, even Boggart Blog could not make up this insane bullshit,) use Machiavellian strategies of manipulation, punishment and reconciliation.

Fish have significant long term memories (so how come they keep swallowing the bait) and are skilled in passing on knowledge (so how come they don’t tell each other how to recognise the bait?) through social networks (no self respecting fish would be without a Plaicebook or My Scales page.)

Fish even have what the paper’s author calls “long standing cultural traditions”.

Unless you are terminally gullible all of this should tell you a lot more about the scientists who wrote the paper than it does about fish. Another triumph for the scientists?

RELATED ARTICLES:
Freaky Frankenstein FishesOnce again we find ouselves questioning the sanctity of science as a new scheme to farm genetically modified (G.M. salmon that grow to twice the size of a normal adult salmon in half the time nears approval by the United States F.D.A.. It this another case of scientists blinding themselves with science and failing to see the very obvious flaws in the plan?
The Big Carp DiariesA spate of mysterious deaths among large carp at fishing lakes around the country aroused our suspicions. It only takes the meresty hint of foul play to hook our investigative reporters and the fish connections provided an interesting angle. We thought our readers would fall for a fish murder saga hook like and sinker. Here is the result of a year long investigation into the stange case of the carp murders. So here is our report, the Big Carp Diaries. Compared to documentaries about Cheetahs, Chimps and Badgers for human interest this is off the scale.
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COMMENTS AND RECOMMENDED REA.DING AROUND THE WEB

In this section we do not necessarily support the views expressed in linked articles but try to give a coss section of interesting and well written articles that we think are likely to stir things up a bit.

COMMENT:
(A random and ecletic mix of what we thought was worth reading recently)

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Will bringing back grammar schools boost social mobility? by Toby Young Daily Telegraph
The possibility that England may shortly see its first new grammar school in over 50 years has, predictably enough, re-opened the debate about selective education. Yesterday, for instance, Allison Pearson came down firmly in favour, while Fiona Millar shot back with an instant rebuttal. I’ll get into that argument in a moment, but first let’s be…

So Why Read Books Anymore
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Eric Holder and the Chicago Way In America Obama's Brownshirts are getting hysterical as they try to make race the major issue in the election campaign.

Dystopian Prophecies Are Coming True - The Government Will Soon Choose Our Wives
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