logo

Boggart Blog Central


Human Mothers To Bear Intelligent Mice?
A new science reports tells us parents who want to have brighter babies should make sure the mother easts plenty of fried food during pregnancy. Problem is the method has only been tested on mice.
Human Mothers To Give Birth To Intelligent Mice
by Ian R Thorpe
2010-01-07
CREATIVE COMMONS: Attribute, non commercial, no derivs.
KEYWORDS: life, socks, sales, january, christmas, humour, humor

Regular readers know how much we love scientists here at Boggart Blog. There is seldom a week goes by in which their weird and whacky research projects and the surreal conclusions they draw from the results do not give us at least one story.

The latest such science story has the added distinction of being the first of a new decade. It concerns science and that eternal obsession of Daily Mail readers, how to guarantee their offspring are child prodigies.

A new scientific study published this week reports in its findings that if women eat plenty of fry - ups during pregnancy they will give birth to brighter children. Now you must remember this stuff is coming from the profession that likes to tell us homeopathy is a load of bollocks. So there you have it, fried foods, for so long demonised by nutritionists are the key to making sure your child is a genius. There's no guarantee you will live to see them grow up and go on to see great things of course but I'm sure a remedy for clogged arteries is "just around the corner" as they like to say in the world of speculative research.

There are bound to be drawbacks of course, as there are with all medical advances. We foresee the boys down at the local greasy spoon being a tad but out when they cannot get their favourite all day breakfast because the caff is full of pregnant Daily Mail readers stuffing their faces with bacon, two sausages, egg, beans and fried slice while their disappointed looking spouses survey a bowl of museli with trepidation.

Enough of real world stuff though, we must focus on the science. It turns out the fry - up diet for creating little polymaths has only been tested on mice. So will it only work on mice? And how can anyone know if a baby mouse will grow up to be a Mouszart or an Einstein. While the thought of Daily Mail readers giving birth to intelligent, talking mice might explain the paper's decision to give away free DVDs of Stuart Little last year is amusing, the study once again calls into question of the sanity of science. Like the work on autistic fruit flies and the research project involving mice with Parkinson's disease one must, must one not, ask how can mouse intelligence be assessed?

They can be trained to poke buttons with their noses to earn a snack, that's about it. Hardly a qualification for MENSA membership is it. Can you imagine the letter of acceptance:

To Mr Mausus Mus,
Dear Mr. Mus,
We are delighted to tell you that although you failed on mathematics, logic, language and comprehension, spatial relationships tests and critical analysis your score on pushing buttons with your nose to earn a snack was so high you have qualified for MENSA.

We can no more assess mouse intelligence in human terms that we can know it the wee cowering sleekit, tim'rous beasties are suffering from Parkinson's disease or if a fruit fly is autistic. Just ask yourself how these things can be measured. Go on, ask yourself.

Because if you ask a scientist its odd on they will reply with the usual cop out, "You just don't understand science."

RELATED POSTS:
Coming Soon To A Waste Pipe Near You - Intelligent SlimeBut you don't want to read such dross today so here's a story about the yellow peril. We're not being racist, this yellow peril is intelligent slime that can think like humans (i.e. it's about a billion times more intelligent than the computers that are ...

The Misery Pill: Unhappiness and Arse DribbleWe have reported extensively both here and at the original Boggart Blog on the plague of obesity and the scourge of arse dribble that punishes those who seek a quick remedy in fat busting drug. Now the pharmeceutical indusrty has gone one better and created a pill that not only causes arse dribble, it makes people depressed as well.
Grey And White Peril
Snail Science and Crystal Meth
Mouse Science Cancer Risk
Human Egg Trade
Denying Lesbian Couples IVF Will Lead To Pub Closures
The Adventures Of Posthumous Sperm
Beautiful Children (With No Love In Their Eyes)
Cryptozoology For Sceptics
Another Hogwash Breakthrough
Baby Born On Bog
Climate Change Science Scam
Climate Science To Blame
Ignobel Science
Obama's Nasty Nazi Science Czar
Looking At The Stars
Scientists In Denial
Science - A Career For Tossers
Childrens' Hospital Fraud
Generation Of Losers
Unhappiest Children In The World
Intelligent Mouse Babies
Octomum
Legacy
Demented Mouse Science
What Are You? Man Or Mouse
Mnemosyne
Spunky Internet Entrepreneurs
Light A Fire With A Laptop
Beautiful Children With No Love In Their Eyes
Scientists Reinvent The Wheel
Scientists Have Not Made Sperm
Stone Throwing Chimp Shocks Scientists
Crocodile Snack Science
Pavlov's Cat
Fish Science
Scientists Have Not Made Sperm
Western Monkeys

If you liked this, please give it a boost

Bookmark and Share

Close Window and return to menu
SITE SEARCH
find keywords on this site

Enter keywords:

Google: Yahoo: MSN:

This free script provided by
JavaScript Kit

INFORMATION & NAVIGATION

navigate

navigate

CATEGORIES

Fiction
Animal related
Art Menu
Belief, Faith and Religion
Celebrity mocking and knocking
Climate and Environment
Comedy, Satire, Humour
Debt Crisis and Money Matters
Driven To Drink
Education Menu
Fear and Panic
Health Menu
History - new perspectives
Humanitas
Jobs Crisis
Living Within The conspiracy
Middle East
Nanny State and The Thought Police
Past Perspectives
Philo & Sophia
Politically Correct Stupidity
Fools & Dreamers
Politics and Economy
Latest News Science and Technology
Sex and sexuality
Sport
Weird and Supernatural
SNACKS (sub topics)
The Ageing population
America
Religion and spirituality
Climate Change
Comedy and Humour
Education is overrated
The environment
Europe
Health
Internet Technology
Jobs and employment
Money and finance
Myths and traditions
Nanny Orwell
People and Places
Science, technology
Society
UK politics
War
World Politics

Our Internet Places
Scribd
Blogster
Ed Butt at Bubblews
Wikinuts
Boggart Blog
Little Nicky Machiavelli
Boggart Network News
Greenteeth Bites
Greenboggart
Boggart Blog Central
Daily Stirrer briefing
Boggart Network News
BOGGART BLOG ARCHIVES
BBselect001
BBselect002
BBselect003
BBselect004
BBselect005
BBselect006
Bubblews Archives
[ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ] MULTI MEDIA
Spoken Word
Video
Music
Graphic Art

Home
Top Of Page
Back Catalogue
Our Comments
FEATURESThe Daily Stirrer
Boggart Blog Central

Comedy Main
Comic Verse
Cartoons
A Tale Told By An Idiot
General
Fiction
History
Thought
Poetry
Science & Technology
Elsewhere

Boggart Blog Daily
Little Nicky Machiavelli
This writer at Authorsden Gathering
Delicious Greenteeth
Boggart Network News

More From Around The Labyrinth

LATEST POSTS & COMMENTS

Another Montauk Monster? Mystery Creature Washes Up On California Beach.
No matter how much the science tits and worshippers of reason, logic and order may hate it, the world had a habit of regularly throwing up mysteries for which there is no simple, logical explanation, for instance, several carcasses of as strange creature that looks to be a dog / seal mongrel have washed up on American beaches in the last few years. WTF is it? That's a question for the people who look after The X Files.

Establishment Closed Ranks When Police Investigations Into Child Sex Abuse Allegations Closed In
Latest development in the cover up of allegations that politicians, lawyers, and celebrities were involved in systematic child sexual abuse groups, police officers have now claimed a series of covert police investigations into alleged VIP paedophiles were shut down as they went 'to the heart of the Establishment'.

UN says Ebola-hit nations at risk of hunger - Al Jazeera
United Nations officials have warned that up to one million people in West Africa are at risk of food shortgaes as nations affected by the Ebola outbreak find harvests reduced due to border closures, restrictions on and neglect of crops. The deadly virus has now killed 6,800 people and severely disrupted daily life in the worst-hit nations of Liberia, Guinea and Sierra Leone.

Christmas Message: Economic Recovery, Bah, Humbug While western government economists pump out propaganda about how economic recovery is steaming ahead (in the hope of persuading consumers to take on debt ad start spending in the befief that good times are just round the corner, and politicians wallow in schadenfreude because Russia looks to be suffering) our economics experts writes about what is realy happening and why oil pices have collapsed. It isn't pretty.

Google quits Spain in paid content row
] Spain's government have defied Google's vow to shut down its Spanish online news service rather than pay for content, [ ... ] The internet search giant threatened to close Google News Spain in December, 2014, before an intellectual property law enters force in January obliging Internet news scrapers to pay for content automatically lifted from other websites. Spain's culture ministry, said it would go ahead with the new law, Google's response is "a matter for the company".

Another Blow To The US Dollar Reserve Currency Status As Russia Sings Up Turkey, India
The move led by Russian and China to dump the US dollar as global reserve currency continues to gain momentum. Most recent nations to sign bilateral agreements to settle cross border transactions in the currency of the vendor are India and Turkey.

Docors, Scientists Greased by Big Pharma? Told You So.
The Physician Payments Sunshine Act, which was passed by the US Senate with the help of an extensive investigation led by Senator Charles Grassley (R-IA), provisions that doctors who receive payoffs from drug or vaccine companies must disclose this when pushing new therapies or medical procedures from what would otherwise appear to be unbiased intentions. (It happens in Europe too, see links in article)

French Goss Mag Outs Gay Politician, Sparks Privacy Row
Gossip magazine Closer has sparked a privacy row in France after it outed a homosexual senior member of France's right - wing National Front party. Closer published photos of the man with his male partner. Politicians and journalists have reacted angrily to whhat they call a gross breach of privacy.

TTIP Tries To Dump US Frankenfoods On Europe; Left and Right Unite To Back States' Right To Ban Them.
As public awareness increases of the way the secret trade deals that even our elected representatives are not allowed to know the terms of, the Trans Atlantic Trade And Investment Partnership (TTIP) and the Trans Pacofic Partnership will increase American global hegemony ...

A beginners Guide To Thinking For Yourself About Climate Change
Climate change has become a more fanatical and more dangerous religion that fundamentalist Christianity, Islam or Zionism. Its followers are prepared to destroy not just themselves but the entire human race and most life on earth before they will admit there is little substance in their dogmas, which are all based on 'evidence' from idols they call mathematical models, rather than on any real world evidence.

CO2 vs Temperature comparison over 400,000 years shows CO2 and warming are not linked
Scientists who are part of the 'Science Is Settled' mob are quite adamant that there is no room for discussion, that climate change is caused solely by marginally increased levels of the trace atmospheric gas Carbon Dioxide is proved beyond doubt. Unfortunately their 'proof' exists only in mathematical models, studies based on real world evidence constantly disagree

Even The BIS Is Shocked At How Broken Markets Have Become.
If the Bank of International Settlements (BIS) the bank where banks and governments do business is worried about the state of the markets, we are in bigger trouble than anyone is letting on.

Child sex abuse inquiry in crisis as victims walk away
Alleged victims of abuse involved in the historic abuse case currently being investigated by MPs and police have advised Home Secretary Theresa May, that they are ready to withdraw support from the Government's child sex inquiry. Twenty = three individuals, some of whom claim as children they suffered serious and prolonged abuse at the hands on senior Members of Parliament, Senior Civil servants and other high ranking figures in the public sector, sent Mrs May a letter claiming the inquiry is "not fit for purpose".

Obesity pill to ‘replace treadmill’ being developed by Harvard University
A magic pill which burns away excess body fat has been one of the wet dreams of mad scientists for decades. Such a pill is now being developed at Harvard University. Researchers claim it could one ‘replace the treadmill.’ (This is daft as we still need exercise to maintain a healthy heart, muscles and bones.

Everything The Science Whores Told You About Eating Fat Was A Lie.
We have been telling you so for years, but at last the world seems to be cathing up with The Daily Stirrer. Another independent study confirms that the scientists ('A sack of rogues bought and paid for with corporate gods' to paraphrase Burns) have been lying about the health risks of eating saturated fat. It's process vegetable fat, created in laboratories by scientists and other synthesized foods that damage human health.

What Would George Orwell Think Of The Screeching Left's Horror At Plans To Shrink The State. In part one of his classic social commentary, The Road To Wigan Pier, George Orwell wrote of the grinding poverty and appalling living conditions endured by people in industrial areas. The second part, which is more revevant to the 21st Century is a rant against the superiority of the upper class 'Fabian' socialists who have hijacked the Labour movement and whose Paternal Liberalism is in almost all ways more repugnant that the uncaring attitude of the old elite.

What Will It Take to Get You to Swallow GMO and Nanotech Foods?

Are you one of these "new technology rejecters"? Apparently you will be given such a label soon if you don't want GMOs or nanoparticles in your food, just as those who ask can the 1.6% contributed by human activity of the carbon dioxide that makes up 0.025% of the atmosphere really be the sole cause of the changes in our climate which has been constantly changing for millions of years before men first stood erect.

Evolution: Theory, Fact or Fiasco?
Much as I have faith in Charles Darwin's Theory Of Evolution as a feasible explanation of how diverse species originate (The Origin Of The Species) it annoys me when science fans insist "Evolution is not a theory, its a fact." Especially annoying of course is when they cite evolution to explain the origin of life on earth or the development of human intelligence. Even more annoying is their assumption that anyone questioning them is a young Earth creationist. Here are a few thoughts on some of evolution theory's inconsistencies ...

Why Food Sovereignty Should Not Be Handed To GMO Biotech Corporations
Most of the GM produce that is finding its way into the human food chain has been modified to make it resistant to herbicides (weed killer) and pesticides (insect killer) that are deadly to humans - just look at the warnings on a packet of garden weed killer or domestic fly spray if you want proof of that. And remember in bulk food production we are talking about industrial quantities of industrial strength toxins. Scientists on the corporate payroll assure us ...

Are Humans Becoming Extinct
some scientists, Guy McPherson included, down at the Climate Change conference who fear that climate disruption is so serious, with so many self-reinforcing feedback loops already in play, that humans are in the process of causing our own extinction.

Older Posts index