logo
To Hell And Back Before The Pubs Close


With religions having such a downer on sex one might think they would be in favour of drink, I mean if you drink enough you are going to be too busy choking on your own vomit to bother about shagging. In spite of that religious leaders continue to promise hell and buggeration to people who like a bevvy

KEYWORDS: drink, alcohol, sin, sex, hell, religion, god, humour, humor
CREATIVE COMMONS: Some rights reserved. Distribution: Non - commercial, attrib, no derivs, All reproductions should be credited to Boggart Blog and linked to "http://www.greenteethmm.com/"

To hell ... And back Before The Pubs Close
by Ian R Thorpe
28 March 2007

Yesterday we brought you news that Dear Old Pope Benny wants us all to be a bit more worried about Hell (LINK: The Cathloic hell Of Pope Benny) as we all seem to have forgotten it is a real place with real fire, real torture and only Supermarket own-brand lager to drink.

Ever eager to jump on any passing bandwagon, other church leaders were quick to put in their two - penn’orth, advancing their claims that as they are all The Only Church That Understands The Message Of The One True God Properly the teachings of their crackpot philosopher are all that stands between us and eternal fire.

Beware of false Gods and false Hells.

The Church of England posits that rather than being a blazing inferno of eternal tortures, it is in fact a cold, dark, lonely place. Sounds a bit like Accrington on a Sunday afternoon.

Muslims who qualify for Hell, according to Sheikh Ibrahim Mogra from Leicester (a member of the Muslim Council of Britain) will burn in fire but will experience deepening levels of pain according to the degree of their sin. Some will be constantly bitten by snakes and Scorpions while others will be made to drink boiling water or pus. He is not clear whether the pus is boiling or served at room temperature.

Taoism and Buddhism are quite a surprise for such touchy - feely religions; well I suppose they did not want to feel left out. Apparently they provide 18 different chambers for different sizes of sin. Gossips will have tongues ripped out, hypocrites and tomb robbers (don’t quite see the connection but there we go) will be dishonourably disembowelled, pimps will be dismembered and blasphemers will be skinned. No mention of what happens to murderers, thieves and people who voted for Tony Blair.

The Hindus however believe that in between incarnations the spirit will live in a heaven of its own making. Well that would do for me, you die, live in a place of your own making for a bit and with any luck you can be back before the pubs close.

RELATED POSTS:
Bond Villain Targets Britain
Holy City And You Thought We Were Joking
Authoritaianism Of Box Ticking
Teen Binge Drinking Crisis A New Socialism
PBR Disaster
Lib Dems Big Idea
ID Cards, The Taxman And You
Boggart Blog Christmas At Pizza Noel Noel
Future Is Canclled
Debt Crisis Menu
Need A Crisis
Systemic Dishonesty
Darling's PBR Disaster
You Live, You Die, And In Between...
To The Barricades
What The Romans Did For Us
It's The Sausages, Stupid
A Case Of Reverse Racism
The Lazy Pupils Examination Aid
A Career In Substance Abuse
Inspirational Old Queen
A Generation Of Losers
The Pissed Pensioners Of Harrogate
Childhood Drinking Put Us On The Slippery Slope You Just Can't Be Too Paranoid
Ten 4 Ten
Giving Up On Work
Poverty: Labour Succeeds Where Thatcher Failed
The Truth About The Economy, Education, Crime and Everything Else
Ten 4 Ten
Robin Hood Tax
Holy City
Where Did All The Money Go?
A Future Of Medieval Serfdom

If you liked this, please give it a boost

Bookmark and Share

Close Window and return to menu
SITE SEARCH
find keywords on this site

Enter keywords:

Google: Yahoo: MSN:

This free script provided by
JavaScript Kit

INFORMATION & NAVIGATION

navigate

CATEGORIES

Fiction
Wide World - travel
Health / Wellbeing
Nature
Real Lives - biography
Past Perspectives
Philo & Sophia
Fools & Dreamers
Comment & Opinion Faith And Spirituality
Poetry Life And Times
Books
Entertainment
Music
Arts & Crafts
Environment
Food
Science & Tech.
Bog of Blogs

Visit The
BLOG INDEX
and keep up with our
comments around the
web

TAGS
Climate Change
BLOGS
Boggart Blog

Little Nicky Machiavelli

Boggart Network News

BOGGART BLOG ARCHIVES

BBselect001 BBselect002 BBselect003 BBselect004 BBselect005 BBselect006
MULTI MEDIA
Spoken Word
Video
Music
Graphic Art

LATEST POSTS & COMMENTS

BULLETIN
New Posts
The Evil Green Bastards Who Want To Save The Panet
So you heard all the politically corect propaganda and you thought going green wouls show you are a good person. Wrong. According to scientists adopting a green lifestyle is more likely to make you an evil, selfish bastard...

Ethical Knickers For Your Green Valentine
A sexy valentine gift for your green lover? Why not some ethical big knickers. Hemp knickers are all the rage with planet friendly females this year. If your girlfriend is more of a thong wearing climate change sceptic than a lentil loving Earth goddess howeer dont blame us if she kills you.

Calorie Offsetting - The Fair Trade Way To Stay Slim
Everybody has heard of carbon offsetting, the super wheeze that will allow those of us in the civilised world to carry on as we are while the people of developing nations sell us their carbon allowances to keep body and soul together. Well how do you fancy our calorie offsetting scheme that allows you to eat what you like and pay a poor person to get fat for you

Hate Crime Law - Another Step Towards Fascism?
Those in politics who like to call themselves the progrssive left or progressive liberals love to talk about fairness and equality. Why themn are they so keen to introduce 'hate crime' laws that will grant privilege to certain groups in a system that depens on all being equal? Call us old fashioned but in our view there does not seem to be much justice in replacing one privileged elite with another.

Nothing Good Has Come Of The Internet.
When a technophobe denounces the internet as anti - social, anti jobs, a force for dumbing down or a waste of time it can easily be dismissed but when the CEO of a major technology company like Sony saays nothing good has ever come of the internet we should perhaps listen.

Rubber Baby Syndrome
If you thought the title would lead to a piece about sexual fetishes you are wrong – well wrongish. A programme on television last night dealt with a fad among women of a “certain age” (post menopausal insanity syndrome) for buying fake babies and acting as if they are not rubber but real real. These women, all well heeled and expensively if often somewhat...
The True Hockey Stick
Believer in the new religion of AGW, anthropogenic global warming or climate change will be sick of having their science based faith mocked and their scientist priests ridiculed. To help them hold to their belief we offer a change to own a fragment of the true hockey stick, the sacred symbol of their religion.

Bond Villain Targets Britain's Future by John De Roe.
Bill Gross, the world's biggest bond investor might have voted for Obama hnd has some sympathy for Labour because they talk of creating jobs, but he thinks the British economy is in worse shape than anyone is going to admit and is quite willing to take advantage of our vulnerability."

GO TO Boggart Blog Back Catalogue for links to older posts

COMMENTS AND RECOMMENDED READING AROUND THE WEB
Jobless Figures - What's Really Going On Wat Tyler at Burning our money on the fraudulent way of presenting the unemployment figures that has produced the apparent fall (but real rise) in the unemployed this year.

Identity Politics The Sauce looks back to the story of April Ashley the first sex change in Britain. Having been a sailor April in her new identity waent on the be a vogue model. It's an interesting way address what role national identity will play in the election.

Forever Young New medical research points to ever longer life. But that will, will it not, only make the ageing society timebomb and overpopulation worse?

Climate Change: More Bricks Fall Out Of The Wall
Another two pieces of climae change science that "proved" the case for AGW collapse under scrutiny.

Wind Farms Could Contribute To Global Warning
AGW sceptics have a new ally, the formerly drum beating, flag waving Climate Change evangelical Massachusetts Institute Of Technology has unveiled a report based on studies by their scientists (who cannot pooibly be wrong because they are scientists) that shows if plans for wind power go ahead wind farms could raise the average gloval temperature by 1degree by the end of the century. Which is nice Climate Bailing Out The Banks Simin Jenkins writing in The Guardian today revealed bailing out the banks cust us poor punter £1 trillion. See The Daily Stirrer for more...

World Climate WidgetSick of self righteous climate change evangelicals. Get the climate csange widget that shows the world hasn't been warming for ten years.

LibLabCon Election Slogan Keeping The politics out of politics.

Time To Hug A Hoodie Dizzy Thinks celebrates the selection of porn movie director Anna Span as a Lib Dem candidate.

FOR OLDER COMMENTS from our blog index click here. MORE FAVOURITES

Home
Top Of Page
Back Catalogue
Our Comments
The Daily Stirrer
Boggart Blog Central

Comedy Main
Comic Verse
Cartoons
A Tale Told By An Idiot
Fiction
Past Perspectives
Philo & Sophia
Fools & Dreamers (poetry)
Elsewhere

Boggart Blog Daily
Little Nicky Machiavelli
This writer at Authorsden Gathering
Delicious Greenteeth

More From Around The Labyrinth

LATEST POSTS & COMMENTS

BULLETIN
New Posts
The Evil Green Bastards Who Want To Save The Panet
So you heard all the politically corect propaganda and you thought going green wouls show you are a good person. Wrong. According to scientists adopting a green lifestyle is more likely to make you an evil, selfish bastard...

Ethical Knickers For Your Green Valentine
A sexy valentine gift for your green lover? Why not some ethical big knickers. Hemp knickers are all the rage with planet friendly females this year. If your girlfriend is more of a thong wearing climate change sceptic than a lentil loving Earth goddess howeer dont blame us if she kills you.

Calorie Offsetting - The Fair Trade Way To Stay Slim
Everybody has heard of carbon offsetting, the super wheeze that will allow those of us in the civilised world to carry on as we are while the people of developing nations sell us their carbon allowances to keep body and soul together. Well how do you fancy our calorie offsetting scheme that allows you to eat what you like and pay a poor person to get fat for you

Hate Crime Law - Another Step Towards Fascism?
Those in politics who like to call themselves the progrssive left or progressive liberals love to talk about fairness and equality. Why themn are they so keen to introduce 'hate crime' laws that will grant privilege to certain groups in a system that depens on all being equal? Call us old fashioned but in our view there does not seem to be much justice in replacing one privileged elite with another.

Nothing Good Has Come Of The Internet.
When a technophobe denounces the internet as anti - social, anti jobs, a force for dumbing down or a waste of time it can easily be dismissed but when the CEO of a major technology company like Sony saays nothing good has ever come of the internet we should perhaps listen.

Rubber Baby Syndrome
If you thought the title would lead to a piece about sexual fetishes you are wrong – well wrongish. A programme on television last night dealt with a fad among women of a “certain age” (post menopausal insanity syndrome) for buying fake babies and acting as if they are not rubber but real real. These women, all well heeled and expensively if often somewhat...
The True Hockey Stick
Believer in the new religion of AGW, anthropogenic global warming or climate change will be sick of having their science based faith mocked and their scientist priests ridiculed. To help them hold to their belief we offer a change to own a fragment of the true hockey stick, the sacred symbol of their religion.

Bond Villain Targets Britain's Future by John De Roe.
Bill Gross, the world's biggest bond investor might have voted for Obama hnd has some sympathy for Labour because they talk of creating jobs, but he thinks the British economy is in worse shape than anyone is going to admit and is quite willing to take advantage of our vulnerability."

GO TO Boggart Blog Back Catalogue for links to older posts

COMMENTS AND RECOMMENDED READING AROUND THE WEB
Jobless Figures - What's Really Going On Wat Tyler at Burning our money on the fraudulent way of presenting the unemployment figures that has produced the apparent fall (but real rise) in the unemployed this year.

Identity Politics The Sauce looks back to the story of April Ashley the first sex change in Britain. Having been a sailor April in her new identity waent on the be a vogue model. It's an interesting way address what role national identity will play in the election.

Forever Young New medical research points to ever longer life. But that will, will it not, only make the ageing society timebomb and overpopulation worse?

Climate Change: More Bricks Fall Out Of The Wall
Another two pieces of climae change science that "proved" the case for AGW collapse under scrutiny.

Wind Farms Could Contribute To Global Warning
AGW sceptics have a new ally, the formerly drum beating, flag waving Climate Change evangelical Massachusetts Institute Of Technology has unveiled a report based on studies by their scientists (who cannot pooibly be wrong because they are scientists) that shows if plans for wind power go ahead wind farms could raise the average gloval temperature by 1degree by the end of the century. Which is nice Climate Bailing Out The Banks Simin Jenkins writing in The Guardian today revealed bailing out the banks cust us poor punter £1 trillion. See The Daily Stirrer for more...

World Climate WidgetSick of self righteous climate change evangelicals. Get the climate csange widget that shows the world hasn't been warming for ten years.

LibLabCon Election Slogan Keeping The politics out of politics.

Time To Hug A Hoodie Dizzy Thinks celebrates the selection of porn movie director Anna Span as a Lib Dem candidate.

FOR OLDER COMMENTS from our blog index click here. MORE FAVOURITES