logo
An Inspirational Old Queen
KEYWORDS: An Inspirational Old Queen, British,monarchy,drink,humour,humor,satire,


The British Royal family have always been held up as role models of probity, civilised values and moral rectitude. If the Queen Mother (died2002) was a role model no wonder we are a nation of drunken, debauched freeloaders.

CREATIVE COMMONS: Some rights reserved. Distribution: Non - commercial, attrib, no derivs, All reproductions should be credited to Boggart Blog and linked to "http://www.greenteethmm.com/"

An Inspirational Old Queen
by ianrthorpe
first posted at Boggart Blog 2006-07-27

Although she died in 2002 The Queen Mother (God Bless Her) is still managing to be an inspiration to us all. Especially, it turns out, to the binge drinkers amongst us.

A new book out this week, written by the Queen Mum’s former butler or equerry or chief cook and bottle washer reveals that is spite of her only being fourteen inches tall the old girl was a formidable piss artist consuming on average more than the nanny state’s recommended weekly intake for women per day!

Her drinking day began with a pre lunch aperitif, a gin and Dubonnet which, as the quick witted will immediately realise, is actually two drinks. Lunch itself was accompanied by wine and finished off with a glass of port. At least five units down the hatch and the sun is only just over the yardarm. Naval terminology is appropriate here as the QM was Lord Admiral of the “Cinque Ports” (or was that “sinks port”?)

Wine was an essential accompaniment for all meals at Clarence House. A doctor once suggested that in order to help reduce her consumption she should drink water at the table.

“Water,” she replied, “isn’t that the stuff fish fuck in?” Actually that is not true, it was Hollywood comedian W.C. Fields who said those words, but I think its funny and Boggart Blog never sacrifices a joke for the sake of the truth.

An afternoon nap helped see off the effects of the lunch session and then old Lizzie was ready for her “golden hour” as she called it, cocktails at six. Properly mixed Martinis are another three units which was ideal preparation for dinner which came with more wine and port. After that the old dear would get into the day’s serious drinking, shots of gin usually, or brandy sometimes.

There are more and more signs emerging that the nanny state is planning a campaign to demonise drink similar to the one that made pariahs of tobacco smokers so we should all take heart from and follow the example of the QM. Medics may say that excessive drinking shortens life but if death aged one hundred and one is premature , I’ll settle for it.

RELATED POSTS
(Hover on highlighted menu items to reveal information about the linked item)

NHS Failing The OldOne of the problems the coalition will face is the increasing cost of caring for the old as medical advances continue to increase lifespan whithout doing much to alleviate the problems of old age and informity such as dementia, atrhritis, and heart disease. Now the NHS stans accused of turning its back on old people in need of care.
Cardiff To Pioneer Drunk Friendly StreetsThe news that Welsh capital city Cardiff is to expreriment with making its streets drunk friendly gave us plenty to speculate about.

Drunk Friendly Streets - Why Not Driver Friendly RoadsNews that the Welsh capital city, Cardiff is to create drunk friendly streets to prevent rat arsed revellers hurting themselves as they stagger from pub to bus station full of drink and alcohol fuelled bonhomie prompted petrolhead fatsally to ask 'Why not driver friendly roads?

Crackdown On Binge DrinkingThey stopped us smoking, now they want to stop us drinking. We have been predicting for years that is the way things would go as the inceasingly obsessive control freakery of the Politically Correct Thought Police leads them to interfere with our freedom to live our lives as we wish and chhose our own method of self destruction. When alcohol has been demonised as smoking now has will they start on sex or food?

Teen Binge Drinking CrisisPoliticians, medical experts and church leaders here in Britain are panicking about eenagers and drink, the so called binge drinking crisis and the availability of cheap alcohol. All around the country young people are getting rat-arsed and behaving in an offensive and embarrassing way. I've read things are ... Decadent Exam Results DayWhere do the television people find those wussy, goodie goodie A level students who come over Anthea Turner (oops, pardon) on a level results day. It just does not present a realistic picture the booze and sex lifestyle of modern youth. Here our cub reporter recounts his own exam results day of alcohol and drug abuse...well school's out forever.
E versus J & B
The Lazy Pupils Examination Aid
Before The Pubs CloseWith religions having such a downer on sex one might think they would be in favour of booze, I mean if you drink enough alcohol you are going to be too busy choking on your own vomit to bother about shagging. In spite of that religious leaders continue to promise hell and buggeration to people who like a bevvy...
A Career In Substance AbuseThere are some weird jobs advertised in the government and public sector but a full page in a newspaper recruitment supplement dedicated to careers in substance abuse deminded investigation. Did they mean you get paid for yelling at a lump of lard 'You're a horrible, greasy disgusting substance' or did they mean recreational use of substances such as alcohol, pot and speed? (drink, booze)
Festival
A Generation Of Losers
The Pissed Pensioners Of Harrogate
Childhood Drinking Put Us On The Slippery SlopeWill the odd sip of booze, wine or beer from the parents glass for young children or a small glass of watered wine or lemonade shandy for older ones lead to moral decrepitude, alcohol dependency, living in a carboard box and early death as a government survey claims or will children included in this adult activity develop a heathier attitude to drink
Tonguing Willie
Rat Arsed Badger
Dumbing Down
Fight For Your Right To Party
You Live, You Die, And In Between...As the government bombards us at an ever accelerating rate with propaganda about health, lifestyle, diet, exercise, alcohol abouse and just about everything else, people just become more immune to all the scare stories and decide you live and die and inbetween you might as well enjoy a drink and a ciggy...
E versus J & B
A Nice Cup Of Tea And A Sit Down
Keep Health Out Of Politics
The Real Queen's Speech Live Forever Or Choose Life
Self Inflicted Illness

News Feeds (Go back to top) <
BBC Health News
[an error occurred while processing this directive]
Yahoo Health
[an error occurred while processing this directive]
INFORMATION & NAVIGATION

navigate

CATEGORIES

Fiction
Wide World - travel
Health / Wellbeing
Nature
Real Lives - biography
Past Perspectives
Philo & Sophia
Fools & Dreamers
Comment & Opinion Faith And Spirituality
Books
Entertainment
Music
Arts & Crafts
Environment
Food
Science & Tech.
Bog of Blogs

Visit The BLOG INDEX and keep up with our comments around the web

TAGS
Climate Change
BLOGS
Boggart Blog
Little Nicky Machiavelli
Boggart Network News
Greenboggart

BOGGART BLOG ARCHIVES

BBselect001
BBselect002
BBselect003
BBselect004
BBselect005
BBselect006
MULTI MEDIA
Spoken Word
Video
Music
Graphic Art

LATEST POSTS & COMMENTS

[an error occurred while processing this directive]

Home
Top Of Page
Back Catalogue
Our Comments
The Daily Stirrer
Boggart Blog Central

More Comedy
Comic Verse
Cartoons
A Tale Told By An Idiot
Fiction
Past Perspectives
Philo & Sophia
Fools & Dreamers (poetry)
Boggart Blog Daily
Little Nicky Machiavelli