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Brown: A Lust For Glory


With Obama hasmstrung by the refusal of the US Congress to pass his bills without reading them first, Gordon Brown sees a chance to grab the limelight.

Brown: A Lust For Glory
by Ian R Thorpe
2009-12-08
CREATIVE COMMONS: Attribute, non commercial, no derivs.
KEYWORDS: climate change, global warning, climate, emission, politics, obama, america, germany, france, china, india, humour, humor, satire

Right, that’s it. I used to have a bit of sympathy for Gordon Brown, the big clunking arse of British politics. I used to think Brown had inherited an impossible situation from Blair and could not admit it without seeming to be trying to blame his predecessor. I used to think Gordon could have been a contender for “decent human being” status. As of today however I want to see Brown’s head on the railings outside the Houses of Parliament along with Blair’s, one of them on either side of the head of Margaret Thatcher.

In Copenhagen this week Gordon Brown, while not quite wearing his guzzies outside his trousers in the traditional manner is posing as the Superman who alone can save the world from catastrophe.

Gordon’s great rival and nemesis among the contenders for Superhero of the Developed World, Stickman Barack (nothing tastes as good as cocaine feels) Obama is hamstrung by the evil conspirators of the US Congress who refuse to pass his bills without their being allowed to read and debate them first. In BO’s absence Gordon is striking the pose of the balls out eco-warrior who is not afraid to raise the stakes.

“We will think about slowing the increase in carbon emissions,” say the Chinese; “We will keep our emissions steady” says India; “We will cut carbon emission by 6% but not any time soon,” say the French; “We’ll go 13%” say the Japanese; “15%” says Germany. “Awa’ wi’ ye, yellow bellied scunners that ye are, I’ll cut by 30%,” says Brown because I am the man who saved the global economy and now I will save us from anthropogenic global warming,” says Gordon Brown.

Gordon you see can quite easily delude himself his policies have already put Britain at the forefront of the war on greenhouse gases. Thanks to his mismanagement of the nations finances emissions actually fell last year as industry ground to a standstill. Now like the snooker player who gets a lucky “in off” Gordon is claiming he played for it. “The success of Labour’s action on climate change he calls it.

As Super Gordon tried to bluff the conference poker school without any decent cards in his hand, like so many inexperienced gamblers he gave us a ‘tell’ that exposed the weakness of his position.

He told the British press his pledged emission cuts will be achieved through taxing road and air travel and domestic fuel and imposing tougher emission standards on older cars. The tell was that Gordon let slip his pet project to expand Heathrow and other airports in the south east will go ahead. This will see and increase of 60% in traffic at British airports by 2020.

So I will not be able to drive up and see my Dear Old Mum in Morecambe unless I shell out a shitload of wonga for road tolls, you, if you drive an older (5 years +) car will have to take on a huge debt, get a bike or become a prisoner in your own home and we will all shiver through the winters unable to afford to switch our heating on. On the other hand we will be able to fly to New York or Dubai if we can afford it because that is good for the economy.

As The Daily Stirrer reported (Copenhagen: The Real Agenda) the whole “save the planet” project is about taxing the poor to penury to allow the rich to carry on with business as usual. Oh, and allowing the victorious politician to proclaim himself the man who saved the world of course.

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