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Boggart Blog Central

Sugar is Kosher; Stupidity and Michaels Chicken Arent
I have not been able to get interested in this new television series of The Apprentice with a bunch of chavs trying to demonstrate their budding business acumen to Lord Sugar and his sidekicks. The usual crop of desperate wannabes on The Apprentice are aged beteen twenty and thirty and thus have had time to develop the unique and idiosyncratic personality flaws and disorders that make them such a repulsive and obnoxious bunch of

Sugar is Kosher; Stupidity and Michaels Chicken Arent
by Ian R Thorpe
2008-05-09
CREATIVE COMMONS: Attribute, non commercial, no derivs.
KEYWORDS: gordon brown, labour, prime minister, downing street, movie, television, satire, humour, humor

I have not been able to get interested in this new television series of The Apprentice with a bunch of chavs trying to demonstrate their budding business acumen to Lord Sugar and his sidekicks. The usual crop of desperate wannabes on The Apprentice are aged beteen twenty and thirty and thus have had time to develop the unique and idiosyncratic personality flaws and disorders that make them such a repulsive and obnoxious bunch of are kissing, back stabbing attention seekers as you could imagine, as repulsive as the desperate wannabe Celebs and Pop Stars of Big Brother and the X Factor rolled into one.

The regular Apprentices are entertaningly unpleasant in different ways, sixteen year olds (and I know, I was one once) are all unpleasant in the same way, mostly because of that hormony miasma that hangs around them.

Still ~I can always look back on my favourite Apprentice moment, the Kosher chicken episode. For arrogance, ignorance, misplaced self belief and sheer stupidity this will never be beaten.

Sir Alan Sugar and his sidekicks in that series, Margaret Mountford and Nick Hewer like The Three Amigos had known each other for years, they complemented each other, they had all the schtick of an experienced comedy act, the knowing glances, the raised eyebrows etc. They knew how to deal with upstarts.

Young wannabes however will always think they can outsmart such old hands, I did at that stage of my career, so did most of you who have scaled the career ladder I expect. We know what to expect from the Apprentices.

The Apprentices did not disappoint; they were as odious a bunch of ambitious, selfish, untrustworthy, nasty, egotistical, back stabbing, self pitying zero-talents as a manager could ever hope not to meet.

Marvelling at their sheer horribleness on tele is a different matter though. They are compulsive viewing.

One week Sir Alan Sugar selected two teams and set them the task of travelling to Morocco and in the souks of Marrakech haggling to get the best prices for goods from the local traders. The teams were sent off with an extremely detailed list of specifications for what they were to buy, a fixed amount of money and a strict time limit.

The tanned cows hide complete with tail did not prove a problem. The team led by nice Jewish boy Michael Sophocles soon found a shop selling hides and leather goods in the souk and the nice Jewish boy (the significance of which will become apparent,) thought he was the dogs bollocks when he haggled the trader down from 200 to 54. So pleased with himself was Michael that he told everyone he was the dogs bollocks loudly and often.

The other team did not fare so well with the hide, they sought out the tannery district of the souk (like a city within a city with over twenty miles of alleyways covering many acres) and had to brave the smells of traditional leather making, a craft that put urine to good use.

Other items on the list, a cactus, a Berber rug and a juicer (I said the list was bizarre) were not difficult. Nor were the medium strung tennis rackets so Michaels team thought they would gain advantage by bribing the shop to delay the stringing until the following day, incurring a penalty for the team.

Things started to get tough with the Mosque Alarm Clock. These wonderful gadgets are cheap alarm clocks housed in a marble effect plastic case shaped like a mosque.

What is wonderful about Mosque Alarm Clocks is they rouse sleepers with a call to prayer, Allahu Akbar, pronounced in stentorian tones. I want one to put in the guest bedroom, nobody would ever outstay their welcome.

Problem for the Apprentices, Sir Alan wanted a green one and green was not the in colour for Mosque Alarm Clocks in Morocco. There was a desperate chase round the electrical quarter before both teams found what they needed.

The most difficult item on the list for the team led by the nice Jewish boy was the kosher chicken. While their rivals headed for the Jewish quarter of the souk led by a young Asian woman who knew how souks, bazaars etc. are divided into different areas for different religions and trades, Michaels team spent a long time discussing what kosher actually was before the nice Jewish boy persuaded them it was the Muslim rule that requires meat to be blessed by someone from the mosque. They rushed off to find a Halal butcher.

I should mention here that Alan Sugar is Jewish. Nobody except perhaps his Dear Old Mum has ever accused him of being nice. People do not get to be billionaires by being nice.

Watched by their accompanying judge Margaret who constantly rolled her eyes at the sheer stupidity of what was happening, the team asked about getting someone from the mosque to bless their chicken so it would be kosher. A not so innocent bystander helpfully told them that in Islam all butchers premises are classed as mosques for purposes of blessing kosher meat.

See, Muslims do have a sense of humour.

A bemused butcher finally agreed to say a prayer over the chicken before slaughtering it.

Back in the boardroom at the end of the show Sir Alan faced nice Jewish boys team. He was not impressed with the report his fellow judge had brought him. The show's catchphrase, YOURE FIRED seemed to be dancing on his lips.

First he reprimanded Jenny who had been appointed team leader for letting Michael usurp her leadership. Then he said YOURE FIRED to another Jenny for organising the attempt to sabotage the opposing teams tennis rackets. Then he asked the nice Jewish boy to tell him about the cow hide.

Yeah well putting the tennis rackets behind us, I did great with the hide, Michael burbled, I haggled them down from 200 to 54,

He was like a puppy expecting to have its tummy tickled.

Yeah, nothing wrong with that, said Sir Alan, his face a mask, unfortunately the other team went to the tanners quarter and bought a hide for 15. Then the teeth bared and the claws came out.

You were supposed to get a kosher chicken, was the one you bought a halal chicken.

No Surralan, it was a kosher chicken, someone from the mosque blessed it. Michael cowered.

Michael, you put on your CV that you are a nice Jewish boy. Im Jewish, did you think that would impress me?

No Surralan, I am Jewish.

Then how come you dont know what kosher means to Jewish people? Are you Jewish or did you lie to impress me?

Well I erm I erm well erm...

You dont know whether you are Jewish, drop your trousers, well soon tell you.

Margaret and Nick exchanged a look that said we feel sorry for him but were having too much fun to help. Michaels eyes roamed round the studio as if he was looking for a straw to clutch at.

I erm um er Im half Jewish.

Half Jewish, bellowed Sugar, well in that case you should know half of what is going on.

Looking at the whole team Sugar said coldly, I asked for a kosher chicken, you brought me a halal chicken because none of you knew what kosher means. His sneering tone and curled lip suggested the team would have done better had they tried to fob him off with a kosher pork pie.

As the judges pondered the fate of Michael, Nick said, I cant understand it, he is clever, he has an honours degree from Edinburgh University.

Margaret bounced it back, I think Edinburgh is not what it was.

A great line for the occasion but not quite fair to Edinburghs excellent University. Michaels plight is an illustration of something I notice more and more. Young people coming out of education are equipped not with insatiable curiosity, a desire to know what is going on and to understand as much about everything as they possibly can, but with insatiable ambition, a swollen and inflamed ego, a blinkered world view, arrogance and a sense of entitlement.

There is an African proverb that should be posted on the wall of every classroom:

Not to know is bad, to not want to know is unforgivable.

Modern education is teaching people to not want to know, to not care and thus to not be aware of things in their world. We have a generation of Michaels getting set to become world leaders in business and politics.

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The theory that China obtained the coronavirus via a Canadian research program, and started molding it into a bioweapon at the Institute of Virology in Wuhan before it somehow escaped could be an attempt by the establishment (the Davosocracy,) to spread fear and panic as they see resurgent nationalism across the developed world and growing scepticism about

Italy most likely member to quit the EU and demand independence after Brexit -shock poll 23:01 (11 pm) 31 January, the United Kingdom is no longer part of the European Union.

Throughout the day, the last on which the UK will be a member of the European Union, more than 7,000 people took part in an online, and completely meaningless except as a gesture, poll which asked which nation they thought would be next to leave the 27 member bloc ...

US Democratic Party Orders Google To Spread Globalist Propaganda
The U.S. House of Representatives Select Committee on the Climate Crisis has demanded, in a letter to Google CEO Sudar Pichai that the Internet Search giant demonetize climate skeptics, and provide 'education' to millions of people who have been exposed to “dangerous misinformation”. Key actions demanded of Google by The Democrats are:

Time is NOT real: Physicists show EVERYTHING happens at the same time

The concept of time is simply an illusion made up of human memories, everything that has ever been and ever will be is happening RIGHT NOW. That is the theory according to a group of esteemed physicists who aim to solve one of the universe’s mysteries.
Most people do not even consider the concept of time but there is nothing in the laws of physics to state that it should move in the forward direction that we know. The laws of physics are symmetric ultimately meaning that time could have easily moved in a backward direction as it does forward. Indeed some adherents to the ‘big crunch’ theory say time WILL run backwards when the universe stops expanding and starts contracting back in on itself.

The BBC is panicking at the public’s rejection of its arrogant Left-liberal worldview
This is nearly over – this weird disconnect between what most of us understand as reality and the world as seen through the eyes of an all pervasive Authority that was apparently appointed (although we never knew by whom) to establish the limits of public discourse. The crisis of confidence at the BBC – and make no mistake, it is a full blown, all alarm bells ringing, catastrophic crisis ...

The grooming gang cover-up is Britain’s real racism scandal

Forget pathetic 'Princess Pushy' Megan Markle petulantly playing the race card when she found life in the goldfish bowl occupied by Britain's Royal Family was not to her liking, the grooming gang cover up is Britain's racist scandal - and it is far worse than the trivialities that get American libtards screaming about "White Privilege ..."

John McCain’s Widow Comments on Jeffrey Epstein’s Sex Trafficking ChargesJohn McCain’s Widow Comments on Jeffrey Epstein’s Sex Trafficking Charges


Speaking at a human trafficking event in Florida, McCain revealed that her family was quite familiar with Epstein’s wrongdoings as one girl from her daughter’s high school was actually among the financier’s underage victims, then suddenly acknowledging that she “knew” about his crimes.
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French Intellectual Jailed for Calling Mass Immigration an “Invasion”
French intellectual Renaud Camus (above) has been conditionally sentenced to 2 months imprisonment for arguing that mass immigration in Europe represents an “invasion.” Summit.news reports: The writer, who is the author of Le Grand Remplacement (The Great Replacement), was charged with “public incitement to hate or violence on the basis of origin, ethnicity, nationality, race or religion.”

“Hard” Of Hearing? PornHub Being Sued By Deaf Man For Lack Of Subtitles
We read today that sex supermaket site PornHub is being sued by Yaroslav Suris, who has filed a lawsuit claiming that its lack of PornHub’s lack of subtitles for the hard of hearing is discriminatory. Suris’ bone of contention is that the website violates his rights under the Americans With Disabilities Act, according to showbiz gossip site TMZ, which broke the story ...

Quitaly Back On As Salvini Prepares To Take On The EU
While the bureaucraps of Brussels were still congratuating themselves on forcing Matteo Salvini’s Lega party out of Italy’s governernment, mainstream media barely bothered to cover the news that Lega won the state elections in Umbria towards the end of October 2019. Thus the story that should have had Europhiles like Emmanuel Macron and Guy Verhofshit crapping themselves was barely noticed.

Police Failed To Act Against Muslim Grooming Gang Due To Fears Over "Community Tensions" A new report based on the evidence of former Grester Manchester Police Detective Constable Maggie Oliver acknowledges that the force failed to stop dozens of girls being groomed and sexually exploited by a network of Pakistani men despite being fully aware of what was happening due to fears over creating “community tensions.” The report notes that the instruction to avoid prosecuting came "right from the top ..."

Asian grooming gang given free pass to rape; police officers told ‘find other ethnicities’ to investigate – detective.
A report published today, authored by child protection specialist Malcolm Newsam CBE and former senior police officer Gary Ridgway, comes following the reopening of an investigation into the death of 15-year-old Victoria Agoglia, who – after years of abuse and days after she was injected with heroin by a 50-year-old man – died in hospital of an overdose in 2003.

Greta Thunberg Slams Australia for Coal Industry, Expands List of Climate Demands
Little Greta Thunberg, who was elected by nobody apparently now speaks for us all on matters relating to climate change. The Swedish climate change hustler who is making a fortune for her handlers from donations to her campaign, again castigated Australia for continuing to mine and export coal despite her previous complaints, adding a call for an end worldwide to the actibity to her list of climate demands to be delivered at the upcoming World Economic Forum in Davos ...

Macron Digs In Against The General Strike, But Could It Finish Him?
As the French braces itself for the latest wave of protests and strikes across the country, as attitudes harden against President Emmanuel Macron's pension and retirement system reforms. Karel Vereycken, vice-president of France's Solidarity and Progress Party, has given his version what's behind the recent wave of strikes and why Macron's efforts to calm the situation down are backfiring.