Jenny Greenteeth

Boggart Blog Central

Nanny State's Thought Police Are Coming To A Restaurant Near You
No matter what party rules it sems nothing can stop the march of Nanny State and her Politically Correct Thought Police as they lead us towards an Orwellian dystopia. Nanny's latest target it seems is restaurants where we will soon not be able to sit down to a meal without her admonishing finger wagging under our noses.

Greenteeth Multi Media
Nanny State's Thought Police Are Coming To A Restaurant Near You
CREATIVE COMMONS: Attribute, non commercial, no derivs.
KEYWORDS:politically correct, thought police, nanny, nanny state, orwell, orwellian, health, food, restuarant, calories, satire, humour, humor

Ever wondered how many calories are in your meal when you eat out? Or in the snack you’ve just chosen in a vending machine? Or indeed your Chokka Mokka Jabba Lokka Fishwife I Am The Walrus Goo Goo Ga Joob latte with marshmallow floaters? Thought not. You're more interested in whether you are going to get a shag / want to shag this person or not. You very shallow people.

Well whether you worry about calories in your Korma or not makes no difference, Nanny State is going to step in and save you from yourself.

It has started in California, the global capital of stupid, where else. Authorities in the Fruitcake State are now proposing that the amount of calories on each item on a restaurant menu be clearly posted for customers to see. Like anyone is going to be looking except for the fat fucker who says, "This burger is priced at $5 and only contains 1000 calories. That's two cents a calorie, you're robbing me. Down the road I can get five calories for a cent

Under new labelling requirements, restaurant chains, bakeries, grocery stores, convenience stores, coffee chains and even vending machines will have to clearly post the amount of calories in each item. The calorie counts will apply to the estimated 280,000 establishments in California that were required to register with the state authority as part of health overhaul legislation signed into law last year.

If it comes to the UK (and if it is happening in America you can bet the Ban Everything brigade of the Nanny State Thought Police will be pressing for it to happen here) it will cripple the restaurant and catering industry. For example, in the UK, restaurant owners already need to check the temperature of their fridges four times a day and keep records for inspection by the Religious Health and Safety Police. Restauranteurs interviewed anonymously have admitted checking a couple of times a week or simply making up numbers so we can trust their calorie estimates as far as we can trust politicians to keep their promises.

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BBC Comedy

BBC Comedy Blog
Updated : Tue, 28 Aug 2012 09:53:42 +0000

Leaked Emails: 'The Greatest Show on Earth'?

Twenty Twelve is returning to our screens on Friday at 10pm on BBC Two.

With the official announcement this week that the Olympic site is coming along nicely, the Twenty Twelve Deliverance team have been working around the clock to ensure that the games go off without a hitch.

Unfortunately, Graham must have left his computer unlocked, as we've been forwarded some e-mails that Ian might not want to world to see...


From: Ian Fletcher
To: Nick Jowett; Graham Hitchins; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: IOC visit

 
As you are no doubt aware, the International Olympic Committee are in London this week and will be visiting our offices on Friday. Following the PM's lead, our official line on the London games is that (despite what I may have said in Wednesday’s meeting) they will be "the greatest show on earth".


From: Graham Hitchins
To: Ian Fletcher; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: RE: IOC visit

What about Cirque du Soleil?

From: Ian Fletcher
To: Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: RE: IOC visit
 
What about Cirque do Soleil??!

From: Graham Hitchins
To: Ian Fletcher; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: RE: IOC visit

That was my question.


From: Ian Fletcher
To: Nick Jowett; Graham Hitchins; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: RE: IOC visit
 
I KNOW - I was making point. Specifically: what you may personally believe is irrelevant - when speaking to anyone from the IOC, this year's games will be the greatest show on earth. OK?

From: Siobhan Sharpe
To: Ian Fletcher; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Graham Hitchins
Subject: RE: IOC visit
 
Pyramids.

From: Ian Fletcher
To: Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: RE: IOC visit
 
Siobhan, I know I have repeatedly asked you to make your emails more succinct, but I think we need to find a middle ground here.

From: Siobhan Sharpe
To: Ian Fletcher; Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope
Subject: RE: IOC visit
 
Pretty sure that the pyramids are one of 'the greatest shows on earth'. Duh. Should be worried about copyright issues?

From: Ian Fletcher
To: Siobhan Sharpe; Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope
Subject: RE: IOC visit
 
You're thinking of 'wonders of the world'. No-one has ever said that the London Olympics will be one of the seven wonders of the world.
 

...Well, the Mayor did, but we managed to keep it out of the press.


From: Ian Fletcher
To: Siobhan Sharpe; Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope
Subject: IOC visit - update!

UPDATE: It seems that the PM has also said "London will be ready on time and on budget" which, to put it charitably, is a half-truth. The press are likely to jump all over this, so today might be a good day to bury any embarrassing news we’ve been sitting on.

From: Siobhan Sharpe
To: Ian Fletcher; Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope
Subject: RE: IOC visit - update!

I’m on it!

From: Ian Fletcher
To: Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: RE: IOC visit - update!

WHO ISSUED A PRESS RELEASE SAYING WE ARE BEHIND SCHEDULE AND OVER BUDGET??!!

From: Siobhan Sharpe
To: Ian Fletcher; Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope
Subject: <<Out of Office AutoReply>> RE: IOC visit - update!
  
Thank you for your message. I am currently out of the office at an emergency press briefing. If your query is press-related please contact Ian.Fletcher@ODC2012.co.uk

From: Ian Fletcher
To: Graham Hitchins; Nick Jowett; Kay Hope; Siobhan Sharpe
Subject: <<Out of Office AutoReply>> RE: IOC visit - update!

Thank you for your message. I am currently out of the office at an unforeseen press briefing. If your query is Olympics-related please contact Siobhan@PerfectCurve.co.uk

Ian.
 
More from Twenty Twelve:

The Twenty Twelve emails were written by Larry Rickard.


Publ.Date : Thu, 29 Mar 2012 15:30:00 +0000

Comedy and Multiplatform

 

Up in Edinburgh, the BBC's College of Production (COP) has been talking to comedians about online shennanigans. The COP's Catherine Scott writes...


Yesterday saw four of comedy's bright new stars share their thoughts on how to be 'funny and multiplatform', during BBC College of Production's live podcast from the BBC Edinburgh Festival base in Potterow. The panel consisted of Daniel Berg, the comedy writer and developer who specialises in viral video, Bec Hill, named one of the "Top 10 Funniest Comedians on Twitter", Arron Ferguson of alternative comedy duo Not The Adventures of Moleman and Iván González, one half of Foster's Edinburgh Comedy Award 2011-winning duo Max and Ivan.

Prolific Tweeter Bec Hill told us how she started using online platforms simply to share her comedy sketches and cartoons with her friends, and was pleasantly surprised when it snowballed into a 3000+ Twitter following. Bec also noted that her online audience has grown much faster than her live audience – "I've reached 100,000 views on YouTube, I certainly haven’t got that in Edinburgh yet!".

Daniel Berg's passion for viral videos was evident when a strong gust of Scottish wind blasted through the pink tent and he remarked "Film that, that'll go viral!". Daniel spoke of how social media and online platforms give new acts the chance for exposure without the need to be commissioned. When wrangling with the shorter attention span of the internet audience, Daniel’s advice to comedians was "Keep your content topical, and keep it short."

Ivan Gonzalez sang the praises of online platforms such as YouTube for giving comedians creative control, and also gave a shout-out to BBC's iPlayer and Feed My Funny for allowing viewers to access comedy outside the restrictions of viewing schedules. Like Bec Hill, Ivan also enjoys the immediacy of 140 character jokes on Twitter – and if the #EdFest feed this week is anything to go by, so do a lot of us (“Just been to a lecture on how to build a ship. Riveting!")

Arron Ferguson's two-man sketch troupe Not The Adventures of Moleman actually began as a solely online act, only venturing out onto the live circuit once they had built a large online following. Noting that "some people think you need to be live to be comedians", Arron pointed out that a lot of NTAOM's sketches actually work better online, because film can provide subtle shots that might be missed in onstage comedy. Arron also gave us possibly the most useful piece of advice on treating online platforms with respect – "Don’t use Twitter to invite all your fans to KFC!"

Although the public passion for live comedy gigs remains strong, any new comedian entering the industry should remember that there is a plethora of other options available to them for making their name and getting their work out there. It might take a while to build up 100,000 hits on YouTube or 1000 followers on Twitter, but as our guests concluded “As long as you’re having fun, that's what matters."

Listen to the full podcast.

Follow College of Production @BBCCop


Publ.Date : Thu, 23 Aug 2012 13:48:00 +0000

Comedy Talent Search - Laugh Track

BBC Comedy Commissioning and BBC Writersroom have joined forces for a second nationwide talent search to find new comedy gold. If you have a big studio sitcom brewing in your mind and can tell original stories, invent characters and catchphrases that can make a live audience laugh, then send in your script.

This is an opportunity not to be missed - you may get the chance of your work performed at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival and at our Sitcom Showcase at the Studio in MediaCity, Salford. You could also be in line for a comedy masterclass on how to write studio sitcoms, plus an intensive week away developing your idea hand-in-hand with BBC comedy producers and established comedy writing talent.

 

The amazing Dawn French will be on the panel of judges. Cheryl Taylor (Controller, Comedy Commissioning), who judged last year's BBC writersroom comedy talent search says: "I was thrilled last year by the number of very funny and original scripts that we were asked to judge. It was a pleasure to read all of the short listed projects as was having the opportunity to meet some of their very talented authors."

The deadling for entries is Wednesday, 21 March 2012. For information on how to enter, visit the Writersroom website.


Publ.Date : Thu, 02 Feb 2012 13:52:39 +0000

David Walliams' Mr Stink Comes to BBC One
 

"Mr Stink stank. He also stunk. And if it was correct English to say he stinked,
then he stinked as well…"

David Walliams' best-selling children's novel Mr Stink is set to come alive as a comedy drama for all the family on BBC One later this year.

The touching, twisted and hilarious tale tells of Mr Stink, who is befriended by a local girl Chloe. Chloe sees Mr Stink every day, but she's never spoken to him, which isn't surprising, because he's a tramp, and he stinks.

 

When it looks like Mr Stink might be driven out of town, Chloe hides her unusual friend in her garden shed. As she struggles to make sure no one sniffs out Mr Stink, her dad tries to hide a secret of his own, and the stage is set for an epic family confrontation. There is also one other person with an extraordinary secret: it turns out that there is more to Mr Stink than meets the eye… or nose.

David Walliams, who will play the role of the Prime Minister in the show, says: "I am beyond thrilled that BBC One is adapting my children's book 'Mr Stink' into a family film. I have written the script, and can't wait to see actors bring it to life." BBC One Controller Danny Cohen added: "Mr Stink is a heart-warming, nose-clenching and funny tale which will appeal to viewers of all ages. It's brilliant to be working with David to bring his magical tale to BBC One." Mark Freeland, Head of Comedy, finishes the stinky love-in by saying: "I am delighted that the BBC is continuing its relationship with the multi-talented David Walliams. Mr Stink has become an instant classic and it's so exciting to see it come to life on TV. Both my children would echo that. But then they both want parts, so…"


Publ.Date : Tue, 21 Feb 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Twenty Twelve is back!

Yep, that's right. Twenty Twelve is returning to our screens at 10pm on Friday 30th March on BBC Two.

This series the pressure mounts as the Olympic Deliverance team try to navigate their way through such delicate issues as how to handle the Algerian team's demand for a mosque in the Olympic village, and how to carry out a Legacy Audit on the rival bids for the Stadium when no one knows what a Legacy Audit is.

Here's a clip of Ian, Siobhan and the ever dedicated Sally, drafting a press release about the Deliverance teams commitment to 'multicuturality':

In order to see this content you need to have both Javascript enabled and Flash installed. Visit BBC Webwise for full instructions. If you're reading via RSS, you'll need to visit the blog to access this content.

More from Twenty Twelve:


Publ.Date : Fri, 23 Mar 2012 17:00:00 +0000


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Updated : Mon, 20 Apr 2015 11:01:43 +0000

Old white men to be able to do whatever they like
OLD white men are to behave as they please unless it affects other old white men.
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It may seem far fetched but it is possible to link the techniques of the climate change / anti capitalist lobby to the brainwashing prorammes used by the Nazis in Germany, Stalin's Soviet regime in Russia and Chaitrman Mao's brutal government in Communist China. Thus it becomes quite similar to malware that infects computer systems. The left do not care about saving the planet, all they are interested in is advancing their totalitarian, globalist agenda.

Libya, Syria, Yemen: Sectarian conflict threatens entire Middle East
Another failure of US foreign policy leads to threat of war as a coalition of 10 Sunni Arab states launches a military offensive against Shiite Houthi militants in Yemen, recently proclaimed by America’s president as a brilliant example of war on terror, but now catapulting the Middle East into the inferno of battle.

Obama's Terrible Trade Pact Is a Scam That Must Be Stopped Says Jim Hightower
Having written a book on the evil trade treaty that will transform the democratic nations into corporate oligarchies, we step aside and hand the baton to Jim Hightower of Alternet who is equally outraged about the iniquities of TTIP's equally evil twin, TPP.

"I'm Not Stupid" Monsanto Lobbyist Refuses To Drink Weedkiller After Proclaiming "It Won't Hurt You"
The glib claim backfired however when the Monsanto lobbyist was offered a glass of diluted Roundup (active ingredient Glyphosate) and asked to drink it.
"Do you think I'm stupid, " the lobbyist blustered ...

Rotherham Child Sex Abuse Probe Puts 42 Police Officers Under Invesitigation
allegations against police officers include neglect of duty by failing to adequately investigate on the basis of evidence or to deal with incidents appropriately, inappropriate comments and evidence of corrupt relationships between police officers and offenders.

U.S. versus Russia War: Top Russian Politics Scolar Stephen Cohen Tells The Truth
We have been blogging for four years about the US drive for war, provocation of Russia in Syria, Iraq, Ukraine and elsewhere made it obvious. But I'm just a news junkie with a strong sense of curiosity and have wondered why the US seems set on this course. Good to see experts like Stephen Cohen, a prominent expert on, Russia are coming onside.

Google Meets White House Officials Every Week, Why?
We have been very suspicious for ten years of the way Google with such apparent ease achieved a dominant position in web search. How did it happen, did Google do something evil, did they invoke the powers of darkness in their meteoric rise. Or were there even darker forces at work, powering Google to a position in which their internet technologies could dominate global information flows? Here's something cynics should read.

Venezuela's President Maduro Accuses USA Of Psychological Warfare
Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro has accused forces in the United States, Colombia, and Spain of waging an international “psychological war campaign” against his country. Barack Obama is behind a psychological war campaign to justify a coup in Venezuela said Maduro (who is not known for emotional restraint in his speeches) as he presented the results of the CELAC meeting in Costa Rica and elaborated on one of the grandest conspiracy theories yet proposed by his government.

The US House of Representatives Openly Calls for Regime Change in Moscow
Aside from Washington's usual lust for war, and the enthusiasm of American politicians to act as cheerleaders for death and destruction (so as to secure their billions in military industrial complex campaign donations, (graft, bungs, slush money, payola), a key part of a new bill before the House of Representatives which calls for lethal aid to Ukraine, has nothing to do with Ukraine at all.

Banning Cash Will Stop Terrorism (and end war, poverty, disease and bad smells)
The cashless society has been talked of for a long time by worshippers of authority, science fanboys, supporters of left wing politics and other people who think that nice Mr. Hitler had some good ideas really, but leading the race to ban cash because it is an aid to terrorism is the extereme right wing National Socialist regime in France.

Stupidity Of America's Lust For War With Russia
We have reported many times on the American attempts to provoke Russia's leader Vladimir Putin in the hope that Puting will then fire the first shot in the war the USA so desperately needs to revive its failed economy, unify its dysfunctional society and restore is to the position of dominant global superpower ...

TThe Idea Of An Infinite Universe Is Fashionable Again
The now little discussed (due to the witch hunt tactics employed by the scientific consensus gangsters) idea of an infinite, eternal, self renewing universe makes a lot more sense than a point at which everything suddenly materialises out of nothing.

Free Speech Is Being Murdered By The Media And Left Wing Authoritarianism
Without free speech there is no democracy. Without democracy there is no freedom. But all over the developed world free speech is under attack from politically correct politics. It is time to start resisting, do not believe the propaganda published by mainstream media, question everything and make up your own mind. as The Buddha said, "Believe nothing you read or are told unless it agrees with your own experience and common sense."

To Infinity And Beyond - Big Bang Theory Trashed?
One 'scientific fact' Little Nicky has challenged in the past is Big Bang Theory. I have lost count of the times that having offered proof that Big Bang is not a fact, the universe is in reality infinite I have become involved in thousand - comment threads in which the arguments of the Big Bang sceptics were contradicted by science tits screeching, "It is a fact because we say it is."

De - dollarization Moves Ahead - Once Again We Told You So.
Add the IMF to the (now long) list of those who apparently share the UK’s view that joining the China-led Asian Infrastructure Investment Bank is an “unrivaled opportunity,” as Christine Largarde says her institution not only sees a “massive” opportunity for cooperation with the AIIB but is also “delighted” to explore the possibilities.

World Domination Freak Bill Gathes Appeals For World Government
In a recent interview with the German magazine “Süddeutsche Zeitung“, Bill Gates, son of a CIA director and the New World Order's 'made man' uttered some highly sinister comments in support of abolishing democracy and nationhood in favour of world government.

Another Reason To Get Out Of EU. UKIP MEP Hits Out At Fishing Policy That Penalises British Fishing Crews
As the General Election campaign starts to heat up, we try to shift focus away from the squabbling between Conservative and Labour about who can make the most promises they have no intention of keeping and to the real issues concerning jobs, social breakdown , mass immigration, and an often overlooked area in which our EU membership has perhaps done more damage than any other, the fishing industry.

German Ubermacht Gives Greek Upstats The Finger In European Union Confrontation. The confrontation between Germany, which some say sees itself as the increasingly dominant nation in the EU as 'ever closer integration' progresses, and Greece, the Euro zone economic basket case but a proud and independent nation all the same, had to come. Germany was more austerity from Greece to protect the value of the Greek debt it hold. Greece want money from Germany to settle old grievances.

France Moves to Make ‘Conspiracy Theories’ Illegal by Government Decree
Political elites and super-bureaucrats must be very worried. New start up political parties, dismissed as populist byt in reality listening to the concerns of voters are making inroads into the political status quo. New media investigative journalists and op-ed writers are challenging the official propaganda (and gaining an ever bigger audience). It’s becoming harder to control consensus reality.

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