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The Second Coming Of Barack Obama, The Obamessiah.

by Ian R Thorpe As The Obamessiah, Barack Hussein Obama, is inaugurated as President of the USA and those Americans who have accorded the first African American President semi - divine status prepare to go crazy, The Daily Stirrer takes a sceptical look at Obama's achievements, failures, ambitions and delusions. Contact us:

The Second Coming Of Barack Obama, The Obamessiah.

by Waddac Hunt

Hallelujah! It’s Obama’s inauguration day! And for some of his followers, it's nothing less than a religious event, the second coming of the Obamessiah. In Washington DC the streets are full of placard bearing Obamaphiles chanting about Hope and change glory and handing out posters that claim Obama’s coming was predicted by the Bible.

The proclamation says that “Barack” is a Hebrew word that means “flash of lightning” (hmm, dubious - first it is Arabic, Barauch is the Hebrew equivalent, and used as a name actually means blessed, hence the equallu popular name Mubarak, most blessed) and Hussein means “good and handsome.” (again dubious, it means good or beautiful but in the sense that the Holy Koran is good and beautiful.) Obamaphiles are not much concerned with meanings of things, like their messiah or the character in Alive through the looking glass they take the view that worlds can mean whatever you want them to mean. Put ‘Barack and Hussein together then and what have you got? “Barack was destined to be a good and handsome man that would rise like a flash of lightning to win victory in a battle against overwhelming odds.”

Such clairvoyant ability on the part of his parents is spooky. Exxcept of course his parents did not give him that name. Looking up Obama's challenger in the same Wonderland dictionary would probably reveal that “Mitt” means “man who rides with dog on car roof” and “Romney” means “born loser.” So maybe the posters are on to something…

The Obama-as-Jesus motif is not just the territory of diopeheads, coke heads, acid heads, crack heads and dick heads however, it has some currency in secular circles, too (as this 100 per cent genuine painting shows). Newsweek is running a front cover that describes the inauguration as "The Second Coming". Of course, it’s Obama’s Second Coming rather than Christ’s, but the editors are playing an old game in using such a controversial metaphor. The object is to grab attention for a decaying publication by featuring an outlandish front cover and then, buried in the middle of a very dull article, you’ll find a small get out clause that says “No, we weren’t really comparing Obama to Jesus. But, hey, we gotcha to read this crummy magazine!”

Pranks aside, make no mistake, Obama has been elevated to the level of a secular messiah among many liberals although they worshipping him even when confronted by the reverntial words quoted in this compilation, The Catechism Of The Obamessiah Cult. The kind of miracles that he trades in may be electoral rather than material (over 100% of eligible voters casting their vote for him in some precincts). Yes, he's failed to resurrect the economy or turn food stamps in to jobs. But he has delivered the Democrats from the awful damnation of four years of Mitt Romney. Hallelujah!

Along the way, Obama has carved out his own liberal Christian niche, appropriating religion for the sake of demonizing his opponents. In the last four years we’ve heard that good Christians – real Christians – support socialized medicine, gun control and carbon trading (irate christians beg to differ, correctly pointing out that The New Testament has nothing at all to say on these topics). The world has even been told that if Jesus had come back on November 6, 2012, he would’ve voted for Obama. Really? He would have come back as an AQmerican citizen with voting rights would he? I’ve always thought that he would enter Jerusalem in glory riding on a Bonneville motor bike. Well it says in The Bible 'The roar of his Triumph could be heard through the land' before summoning the great and good of the A, B and C lists to mount the podium and be hugged by the god on earth and his favourite disciple. And none would be able to resist the call; “It is easier for a celebrity to walk through the eye of a needle than it is to avoid a photo shoot with Michelle Obama.”

In their second terms American Presidents traditionally start to think about their legacy and their 'place in history'. With a catalogue of disaster behind him Obama may well seem more like the second coming of jimmy Carter that a Messiah and he is guaranteed a place in history as the first (and possibly the last) African American President. But he wants more, he wants history to remember him as the man who destroyed the American dream and transformed the USA into a Soviet style bureaucratic dictatorship.

The “legacy thing” may be harder than Barack Obama imagines. For his second term, Obama has a focused, though as yet unpublished agenda: to achieve presidential greatness in the eyes of Americans. In this, he will almost certainly fail because in both 2008 and 2012 the largest voting blocs in the Presidential elections were the 'couldn't be arsed voting' faction, the indolent, those disillusioned with politics and the people who simply refuse to take part in a process that only allows them to vote for the candidate they find least bad. He is already a historic president (sic) but there is a chasm between being historic and being great.

As any fule kno the three “great” presidents are Washington, Lincoln and Franklin Roosevelt. They topped the first presidential ranking by historians in Life magazine in 1948. Obama will not be joining them. The first requirement of presidential greatness is that the country faces an existential threat: something that puts the American experiment — its embrace of freedom and equality, its trust in democratic institutions, and its belief in itself — at risk. The great presidents have all defused that risk. George W Bush might be justified in claiming such an honour though one terrorist attack hardly qualifies as an existential threat and Bush having inaugurated the War On Terror did not destroy the enemy, he merely handed the conflict on to Obama

In 1789, no one knew whether the Constitution would survive; Washington’s stature inspired loyalty that gave the system permanence. Lincoln’s single-minded pursuit of total victory over the Confederacy — when many in the North, discouraged by the endless bloodshed and inconclusive combat, wanted a truce — saved the Union and ended slavery. FDR preserved the nation’s democratic political values and institutions in the face of an economic collapse that gave rise, from left and right, to calls for radical change; and, of course, he presided over victory in World War II.

Obama will be denied a crack at greatness because, for all the his country's problems, none yet rises to the level of mortal peril. Obama’s reputation will necessarily be less exalted.

So no matter if he managed to gain some economic nous, grow a backbone and reverse his foreign policy disasters, halt rising unemployment and unite rather than further polarizing the nation, when it comes to fulfulling those grandiose ambitions, Obama is never even going to be a contender.

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