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Strewth, the Wallabies Have been At The Opium Crop
KEYWORDS: opium,drugs,australia,tasmania,crop circles,humour,humor,satire,technology


The Australian Island of Tasmania is the largest grower of legally licenced opium poppies in the world. But strange things have been happening, crop circles have appeared in the poppy fields. And this has produced a new theory of how crop circles are made.

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Strewth! The Wallabies Have Been At The Opium Again!
by Cleo Hart
first posted on Boggart Blog 2009-06-29

Crop circles have been making headlines again this year, with a new series appearing in Wiltshire. Now, of course, you and I know that crop circles are created by extra terrestrials from outer space, and this is their way of communicating with us. The latest series in Wiltshire, when decoded by experts, tells us that the world will end on December 12 2012.

However, there are people in the government and certain areas of media that pooh-pooh the idea of alien activity, and suggest that the crop circles are made by artists, farmers trying to make money, and pissed students on the way home from the pub. Tales of this kind have been said to have been created to 'throw us off the scent', and that the people behind this propaganda are protecting the members of government and the media that actually are from outer space. But we all know that aliens are of a higher intelligence than the average human, therefore there couldn't possibly be any working in government or mainstream media.

The Tasmanian government has come up with a novel way of explaining their recent crop circles, though. Being the largest supplier of legally grown opiates for use in the pharmaceutical industry, they are having a few problems with stoned wallabies. The marsupials are alledgedly eating the poppy crops, getting high, and hopping around in circles. For up to 12 hours. Sheep and wild deer have also been spotted behaving oddly, sheep walking around in a large circle for hours on end.

Personally, I've always thought wallabies are controlled by aliens; I mean how else would they have worked out that those pretty flowers in the next field would get them high?



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