Another Stupid Criminal Story
by Ian R Thorpe
CREATIVE COMMONS: Attribute, non commercial, no derivs.
KEYWORDS: crime, criminal, America, prison, movies, humour, humor
Jenny Greenteeth loves a stupid criminal story.
On top of that, we do not hear much about the American mid - west state of Wisconsin. It seems to a little like Herefordshire in that everyone knows itís there but nobody cares much. For these reasons a stupid criminal story from Wisconsin is especially welcome.
Don't be put off by our introduction, there are a lot of good things about Wisconsin, it is not all criminals and badlands. The state produces beer and beef and the state penal system is one of the most enlightened in America. Whether this has anything to do with the stupidity of the local criminals is one for social scientists to ponder.
The question of why criminals, like John Oyler for example, insist on making life much more difficult for themselves than they ever could in the process of earning an honest living would furnish the background for several PhD theses.
Our hero, a painter and decorator by trade was serving 45 days for violent conduct and resisting arrest and had been assigned to a work release programme. in theory this was more beneficial to his rehabilitation than spending his time in the prison kitchen cooking up meth or learning to operate internet scams in the prison computer room.
loss of liberty is a terrible thing , but 45 days less time off for good behaviour is not all that harsh a sentence.
So we must wonder what, if anything at all, was going on Johnís head the day he decided to ďdo a Ferris Bueller.Ē Unfortunately the job where John should have been getting busy with paint and brushes was opposite a casino and the lad could not resist the flashing lights and kerchinking coins. As soon as the bossí back was turned he took off to play the slots.
Another visitor to the casino that day, a legitimate one, worked at the prison as an administrator and recognised John.
His Ferris Bueller stunt earned him an extra thirty days.
Letís hope John is not a total movie fantasist. If he is this could be the beginning of a Cool Hand Luke saga.
Burglary For DummiesBoggart Blog occasionally gives an award to the Stupid Criminal Of The Week. We do this to try to highlight to aspiriring young criminals the importance of working hard and paying attention in school if they hope to have a successful career in crime. Too many people think of crime as a soft option career wise, there are no degree - entry restrictions or difficult apprenticeships. This story however shows a career in crme is not for dummies.
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